- God: Gabe, stop, I'm working.
- Gabriel: I WANT TO MAKE SOMETHING TOOOOOOO!
- God: Here's a box of parts, go nuts.
- God: -several hours later- Gabe? Where are you, my son?
- Gabriel: DAD, LOOKIT!
- God: Dafuq is that?
- Gabriel: A PLATYPUS!
one time in freshman year my biology teacher was teaching us about chromosomal disorders and apparently some women can have three X chromosomes and she went to go look up some pictures of what some women afflicted with this condition look like. unfortunately my teacher typed in “XXX females” and that worked about just as well as you’d expect
Right so im walking home and I see this guy rolling a cigarette under a streetlamp and when he clicked his lighter THE FUCKING STREETLIGHT WENT OUT
I stopped in my tracks and stared at this guy who looks up at me then to his lighter and hes as surprised as me then he takes his thumb off the trigger and THE STREETLIGHT TURNS BACK ON
HE GAVE THE MOST SURPRISED LOOK OF ANYONE EVER AND THEN SHOUTED “LATER MUGGLES” AND FUCKING RAN OFF
AM I DREAMING